Belive it or not, a lot of Street puppies come to Homeless Nation via a red carpet, and this designated stop is just another stop after the crazed late night club scene VIP room stop, the boogie till you puke sports bar stop, the divorce and lost everything stop, the court-ordered rehab stop, the sprained my ankle on the corporate ladder stop, or the 'met the wrong guy/gal stop and the next thing you know everything I had belonged to him/her...including the cat.
And if you are this kind of Streetpuppy, you're in for a tough time.
Welcome to the land of cheap haircuts, cheaper shoes, bad hair dye jobs, worse dental work, Taco Bell, the dollar menu at McDonald's, and nothing left over to buy a $100 bottle of Clinique moisturizer, or a $20 kohl eye-liner.
You won't be getting manicures and pedicures anymore - and that goes for the ladies, too - thus you will have to get one of those swiss knife thingys and make do with slicing up your own toes and smacking on some cheap polish, and be careful, you can get an infection, and you don't have enough money to pay a doctor and the ER tends to put you way on the back end of the to do list behind the chronic liver problems and beatings.
As for bikini and eye-brow waxing. Well, you can get one of those $5 kits with those little strips, but if you're not used to doing it yourself, it will hurt even more than when your favorite skin care expert attacks you with that hot wax.
Oh, yeah, skin care. Those days are so o v e r. Exfoloiate the word 'exfoliate' from your vocabulary.
Forget about crisp white pressed shirts, you don't have an iron and they will get dirty and wrinkled in no time.
Ditto on the really expensive pair of really good shoes you would wear with a crisp white shirt and neat little black skirt. Somebody will steal them and sell them for the $5 it will take to get a piece of rock to smoke.
We don't even want to hear about pearls. And that goes for that beautiful birth stone ring you used to wear, too. Only a fool would bring real jewelry into Homeless Nation, unless somebody taught you along the way how to really handle a box cutter.
You will be buying a lot of $4 'cheater' glasses for reading, and don't even think about those designer frames you had to leave behind, the ones that cost you $300, and not worth a penny of it.
We're hoping you didn't wear Burberry anything in that former life, thus the only designer names we will mention here which we know you will regret losing are Chanel, Calvin, Polo, Versace and of course, J.Crew.
Are you depressed yet?
Hold on, we haven't even gotten to the several types of work out shoes, the designer work out clothes, the cashmere everything, the $60 T tops, yadda yadda yadda.
We hope that all of this is enough to make you, if you are one of those VIP Streetpuppies, realize a couple of very important things.
There are a lot of people standing around you who have never had any of these things, and never will, and they spend their days mourning, not the loss of their hairdresser, but the loss of a simple roof over a simple place for themselves and their very hungry children.
And you knew it all along. Money isn't everything and certainly didn't make you happy, else you would not have ended up in this place.
And after wallowing in self-pity for awhile, you might be able to pick yourself up, dust yourself off and get back in the batting box. Just follow the lead of all those other people around you who are struggling for a lot less than you are asking for, and go out and do it everyday. (Don't pay any attention to the dolts who like wallowing in their self-induced misery, they like it here, let 'em stay."
And another thing, before you drown yourself totally in misery thinking about what once was...this too shall pass.
No comments:
Post a Comment